Monday, September 1, 2008

Frank Beamer Hates Cupcakes



I'm Sean Morgan, and I love sports. For the most part anyway. For every Boise State upset of Oklahoma there's Brett Favre being called a gunslinger for throwing interceptions and wearing wranglers. This is my soap box




Cupcake Weekend




What I Hate...


What exactly does the University of Iowa learn about their team by kicking the crap out of Maine University? The Hawekeyes offense has been playing the Hawkeyes defense for the last half a year, so tell me, what does any big school learn about themselves by abusing Division 746 Vermont? Let me put it this way...

Maine Defenseive Tackle Douglas Alston is 6 foot 3, 215 pounds
Iowa Quarterback Jake Christensen is 6 foot 1, 215 pounds
Need I say more?
Yes I do, because as lame as it is that giant schools pretend that spanking students from Stony Brook University somehow makes their players more battle tested, the real scumbag in this is the tiny schools that take the beatings.
4.5 million dollars were given to the Maine Athletic Department so that their players could be shipped to Iowa City and be shamed and executed. But hey, atleast there's cheerleaders.
What I Love...
When big pompous schools pay tiny schools crazy money to slap them in public. It's like in Dirty Harry when the bad guy pays a drug dealer to stomp on his face so Clint Eastwood won't recognize him. And if you didn't get that reference, don't worry about it, it just means you have more friend then me, or cooler ones, or both.

4 comments:

UISJMC Schwartz said...

And I think the cupcake syndrome is only going to get worse. High-end D-I teams used to be satisfied rolling up on tough D-II powers in the opener, but now you're getting schools like Appalachian State and Utah winning at Michigan, which means the big dogs are going to look for even more feeble opponents in their openers. I think we're about 10 years away from an Iowa-Coe season opener.

uisjmc Cabalka said...

About Iowa killing Maine last weekend...think of it in different terms:

beginning of the season you've practiced for weeks, scrimmaged and you're thrown into games. I think it's nice to get an easy team in the schedule to secure a win to boost the team's confidence. We came out of a losing season, lost pathetically to W. Michigan, so why not come back into the season with an almost guaranteed W?

UISJMC Schwartz said...

ASSIGNMENT FOR TUESDAY--
You're President of the World for one day. You can change any three things in American sports. What are they and why?

UIJSMC Cardile said...

I agree with you, but I think your post makes the point for why coaches should like cupcakes. The difference between lining up an OK team (ECU) and an awful team (Maine) just isn't that big in the eyes of voters. So, teams are only going to continue to do it. Don't be surprised to see VT ease up their opening week schedule in the near future